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The applicant provides two clear reasons motivating the student to pursue graduate study: She then supports those two reasons with examples and analysis. The applicant gives thoughtful analysis of the advantages she has been afforded that have allowed her to study music so extensively.
We get the sense that she is insightful and empathetic—qualities that would add greatly to any academic community.
This is a strong, serviceable personal statement. And in truth, given that this for a masters in music composition, other elements of the application like work samples are probably the most important.
However, here are two small changes I would make to improve it: I would probably to split the massive second paragraph into separate paragraphs. Did she think about them during hard practice sessions?
Is she interested in composing music in a style they might have played?
More specific examples here would lend greater depth and clarity to the statement. Are you ready to compose…your personal statement? Want to improve your GRE score by 7 points? We have the industry's leading GRE prep program.
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Try our 5-day full access trial for free: Get a great GRE score. Guaranteed This statement is clearly organized. Almost every paragraph has a distinct focus and message, and when I move on to a new idea, I move on to a new paragraph with a logical transitions.
This statement covers a lot of ground in a pretty short space. I discuss my family history, my goals, my educational background, and my professional background.
In addition to including information about my personal motivations, like my family, I also include some analysis about tailoring health interventions with my example of the Zande. This is a good way to show off what kinds of insights I might bring to the program based on my academic background.
My public health recommendation: Grad School Personal Statement Example: For twenty-three years, my grandmother a Veterinarian and an Epidemiologist ran the Communicable Disease Department of a mid-sized urban public health department.
The stories of Grandma Betty doggedly tracking down the named sexual partners of the infected are part of our family lore.What is the personal statement?
• U se a word processing program to write your responses—don’t type them directly into the application. This way, you can keep track of the personal statement guide for freshman applicants. Prompt #1 Describe the world you come from—for example, your family. College essay — basically the same as a personal statement.
(I'll be using the terms interchangeably.) (I'll be using the terms interchangeably.) Essay prompt — a question or statement that your college essay is meant to respond to. Also, a university personal statement works differently to a personal statement you'd write when applying to a job – so don't confuse the two.
What are university entry requirements? How long should a personal statement be? You have a maximum of 4, characters and 47 lines to write your personal statement. When it comes time to pen your personal statement, practice that, too. Revise, revise, and then revise again.
It often takes students many drafts before they have a personal statement that demonstrates their best writing and clearly conveys the essay’s message. 5.
. Write your own awesome personal statement with our COLLEGE APPLICATION ESSAY LAB, which will guide you through the process, providing tips and even more examples along the way. Before you start, check out our own sample essays—or scroll down for the Best of the Web.
Uses the term “personal statement ” instead of college essay. The connotation is that it is not an academic writing (think English class “essay”), but a personal reflection of a student’s inner soul, hence the term “personal statement”.